Life is art
// March 28th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // Everyday, Photos, Relationships, Stuff I Like
Lately I have been very much inspired by Amber Rae. I have been quoting or re-blogging her Tumblr posts almost daily! Today’s post inspired me to not give a damn about who is reading my blog or tweets and just let it go. I honestly haven’t been blogging that much text lately because I don’t want to share how I am feeling with you, my anonymous reader. Mostly because I don’t really know who you are, since my Google Analytics show that I have regular readers, but I only have two regular commenters. I was worried about things like, what if my emotions are boring? What if my thoughts are inane? And I also have a hard time sharing my feelings about other people because I know those feelings are apt to change at any given moment.. I feel like putting them down on the internet will forever etch them into history and possibly haunt me in the future. So I’m going to let go of this fear and blog like no one’s reading. I have this confession I have been holding in the last few days and I want to tell wendyness.com.
I became very emotionally burnt out recently. A combination of high job stress, life stress and relationship stress. I noticed immediately when I started building up walls around myself again and I didn’t like it. I wanted something that felt free again, no matter how ephemeral. Then I found it.
I made a new friend who came with a one week expiration date. I proposed we just live like the world is going to end and it has been fucking fantastic. He is sarcastic, dry, blunt, doesn’t give a shit about most things and secretly nice. In other words, a facet of me. We’ve been having fun. This was exactly what I wanted and could handle. Everything is absolutely peachy.
So why? What? Huh? This is so not like Wendy! Yeah, it’s not. I’m so completely obsessed with the long term details of things that I sometimes forget to enjoy things for the moment. It took my mum telling me to stop worrying about long term everything and enjoy things while they happen to stop worrying myself sick and just enjoy the last two awesome weeks of visiting friends. I think her words were life changing for me. I feel like a good balance of compulsive, indulgent Wendy and responsible, rational Wendy. And I feel alive. I feel interesting. I feel creative. I feel beautiful.
So here’s to you, J. If the last two weeks helped me regain my peace of mind, then the last week with you helped me regain my self – my Wendyness – and you probably won’t ever know. At least I told Amber Rae! :)
“I think everything in life is art. What you do. How you dress. The way you love someone, and how you talk. Your smile and your personality. What you believe in, and all your dreams. The way you drink your tea. How you decorate your home. Or party. Your grocery list. The food you make. How your writing looks. And the way you feel. Life is art.” – (via)
